My Own Coming of Age Experience

The picture is of me and my grandmother at her surprise 70^th birthday party. This picture was taken in November of my freshman year.  At this point in her life, she was diagnosed with lung cancer and already had a surgery to remove one lung.  The doctors told her she only had a couple months to live.  She was truly an inspiration to not only me, but also my whole family.  I couldn’t have asked for a better grandmother.  She would do everything and anything for her children and grandchildren.  On my weakest days, she always found a way to make me smile.  I admire the strength she showed throughout all the tough times dealing with her cancer.  I can only wish I had half the strength she had.  Even when she struggled with her health, she still put the family first.  When she passed away in July, the summer before my sophomore year, I was an emotional wreck for some time.  I did not understand why such a great lady had to go.  After her death, this picture was hung in my room.  I would look at it everyday to remind myself she was always with me.  This picture would help me be strong on my weakest days.  It reminded me of that great attributes my Grandma had, and helped me become a better person.  Looking back, this picture help me deal with one of the hardest things in my life, the death of my Grandmother.  This was an emotionally important event in my life that has only made me a stronger person.  To relate this to the articles we read in class, it helped me understand the Pascoe reading a little more.  I could actually relate it to real life.  When my Grandmother passed away, the girls of the family showed their emotion much more then the males.  Although, both genders were equally sad about the death.  Unfortunately, it is more exceptive when girls show their emotion more than males.  If the males showed emotion at the funeral or any other time, my family definitely would not call them gay or a “fag”.  I think they were just so used to trying to hide their emotions since its more socially acceptable for girls to show emotions compared to males.  This is just a real life example about how males in our society are taught to hide their emotions so they do not appear “weak”.  Another example is when men did show their emotions through this hard time, you did not see males comforting males.  On the other hand, females were always giving each other hugs and comforting one another.  I just think that males are so used to trying to hide their emotions so they feel “masculine” that they do not really want to associate themselves with males who are showing “fag” like characteristics.  Just like in the reading, at the River Hill High School, the term “fag” was something you did not want to be called or associated with.  It was a term that people called each other for showing a lack of masculinity and being weak.  So just like the males in my family, they did not want to be portrayed as weak so they tried to hide their emotions.  They are just accustom to the society’s social norms. 

For the next part of my own coming of age experience I choose to write about my senior class’s song, My Wish by Rascal Flats.  The song is about someone’s future, and I was about to enter the next chapter of my life.  Going off to college was going to be a new experience for me.  I had so many mixed emotions.  I was going to be living three hours away from home, leaving all my high school friends, and going to a new place and start up another life.  This song talks about all the good things that can happen in the future.  So when I listened to it a couple of years ago before I went off on my own, it helped and comforted me with my mixed feelings.  It focuses on all the good things that are about to come.  I still listen to this song every once in awhile, and it motivates me to do well and reminds me that there is still a great future ahead of me.  To relate this to class, I’m going to compare this with the two readings of Kearney.  I believe that the girlhood has not changed too much over the years.  Kearney discusses the “culture of the bedroom” which is where girls read magazines, practice doing makeup and talk about boys.  I still believe that the girlhood involves the “culture of the bedroom” today.  But now days, I feel as if girls turn to media more than anything.  Yeah they are still doing all those same activities I mentioned, but now they are doing those while listening to music or watching TV/movies.  So to relate this project, I believe that girls turn to media just like I listened to this song to help with my mixed emotions about going off to college.  My friends and I still listen to My Wish when we get together, which brings back old memories of senior year and lets us know there is still a great future ahead of us.  Another example of how girls turn to media now days, girls listen to Taylor Swift songs to help them through breakups.  Kearney argued that American girls are more involved with media now days.  I do agree with him, but they media today is a lot easier to get access to. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xz32I_GbpeU